So many young people are lonely. Why is that?
Basically girls and boys want the same things. Friendship, happiness, the
creation of future (sex) and success in life. When you are old enough to be
considered “grown”, you will want the same things!
Each grows up looking out. They see other confident people or so they seem.
Almost everyone is thinking “they sure have their act together.” But in fact, the
"confident person" is often just as concerned as the “less confident person.”
The confident person maybe just as rattled as anyone else!
There are some that are truly confident and cheerful. You will find they are
very easy to talk to and easy to be friends with. They are jewels.
Related article Do You Know You ARE BEAUTIFUL?
How to Break the Ice!
The first thing is to know the “ice” is very thin and really isn't there.
An opening remark can be about something you have in common. If they are
of age, ask about school! There is always something to say about that place.
(Don't stay on subjects that are negative.)
Try the weather. That is always safe. You can point out the sun always come
out after a storm!
Ask questions about the subject! After a couple interchanges, you'll probably
The other person is so relieved you are not dangerous.
You will find the occasional person, who is so fearful, they will lash out without
Handling the Fearful Person
It's pretty simple. They are fearful because they have been attacked so often.
Most often the parents have created this fear. Though it is not always the
parents, siblings, relatives or people outside the family can crush a child
If the person lashes out, merely back up. Stop talking for a couple seconds.
Re-approach and ask them are they alright. In other words show concern for
them. They've probably driven off most potential friends with their “fierce
If they persist, leave them alone as they've been ruined by their environment.
There are many other cheerful people you can reach easily.
The Popular Crowd
These young (even adults) people are often really lacking in true confidence.
They band together to put up a strong front. A heard creates safety.
Each of them have their doubts and fears. They will not admit and are not
easily brought to talk intimately about themselves. They've been betrayed so
many times. Unfortunately and worse, they've betrayed others too often to
Who has The Right To INSULT You?
YOU ARE RIGHT!
What is the Worse Thing That Can Happen?
There's no point in life where people are not important. However, you must
choose your friends.
If you find one person in ten who's easy to talk too and isn't a fake
(pretending) you've done good.
The worse thing that can happen is you eliminate or drop the people that will
not help you in life. Another way of saying this is lose the downers before they
drag you down.
A friend should be concerned about your happiness, your success, your
future. And you should be concerned for them.
As you get to know people, your circle of friends will grow. There are many
many great people out there!
Realize that almost anyone can have a bad day where they talk harshly or
make poor decisions. Don't abandon them. You might back off a bit. But as I
said earlier, ask them if they are alright! Ask questions.
CAUTION: Don't tell people what to do or to think. Let them figure it out.
They'll love you for this!
What is FRIENDSHIP?
If you look up friend in a dictionary: someone who you like, know, trust or
someone on your side.
It is important that your friends really are on your side. You can't like someone
who is totally acting against you. That person is not your friend.
Notice the word “trust”. If you can't trust a person, they are not your friend.
If you marry, you trust your spouse. When they go out and have sex with
another person, they have betrayed your trust. Huge upsets result from
betrayal of trust.
When you're younger, your boyfriend goes out with your best girl friend. I will
point out here that neither of them were your friend in the first place. They
both betrayed you. Find new friends!
When and if this happens, you can feel pretty crappy about it. That is natural.
No one likes to be betrayed.
A related article that directly applies to that situation is Dee-Pression
(Depression). Read it and see if you find my advice workable!
It is wise to find out if people are trustworthy before you commit to a
relationship with them.
The Importance of YOU!
How to Know Who Do You Trust?
Love, strong friendship, is a result of lots of communication and agreements.
My wife and I text several times a day. I always communicate that I'm happy
with her, like her and so on. Complements are hugely better than complaining!
This continuous positive communication helps keep the feeling we have for
each other alive and strong!
If you let the communication fall out and the love or friendship will suffer to
some degree or break apart.
If you have questions, let me know. I'll coach you through situations to a
definite success. I am an expert!
Listen and Guide, Someone to.
©2006-2014 Carl Watts www.carlwattsartist.com 012014 edited 110614